Debra Fileta

4 min read ⭑

I’ll never forget my first job right out of graduate school. I had just finished a master’s program in counseling psychology and was so ready to start working as a professional counselor. I loved people. I loved listening to their stories. And I loved helping them make sense of the things that were going on in their lives. I started working for a Christian organization that was offering me a solid, full-time job and amazing experience as a counselor. What more could I ask for?

Within the first year, I knew this job wasn’t what I had hoped it would be. I felt overwhelmed with the workload and the clients I was expected to see. I was coming home each day emotionally exhausted, and mentally drained. There were times I even thought about switching jobs or changing careers altogether. But as I continued working there, I kept telling myself that I just had to push through and keep going.

Over time, my physical health began to suffer. I was having chronic migraines, and my body was starting to feel the effects of the stress. But what was even worse was my emotional health. I was feeling down and discouraged, and I couldn’t seem to shake it off. At one point, I realized that my life had started to look like a broken record, and I was stuck in the same unhealthy patterns. I kept pushing myself to the point of exhaustion, believing that it was what I had to do to be successful. But I was wrong. I had lost sight of what it really meant to be healthy and to live a life that was filled with meaning and purpose.

One day, I came across a quote that really struck me. It said, “You can’t pour from an empty cup.” I realized that I had been trying to pour into others without first filling myself up. I had been so focused on my job and my responsibilities that I had neglected my own well-being. I had been running on empty for far too long, and it was taking a toll on every area of my life.

That’s when I knew I needed to make a change. I started to prioritize myself and my own needs. I began to practice self-care and to fill myself up so that I could pour out into others. I realized that living a life of meaning and purpose wasn’t about pushing through and burning out. It was about taking care of myself so that I could be the best version of myself for others.

I started to make small changes in my daily routine. I began to take time each morning to pray and meditate, to read my Bible, and to spend time with God. I started to exercise regularly and to eat healthy foods that nourished my body. I made it a point to get enough sleep each night and to take breaks throughout the day to rest and recharge. And I began to set boundaries in my work and personal life so that I could have a better balance between the two.

As I began to fill myself up, I started to feel more alive and energized. I was able to pour into others from a place of abundance, rather than from a place of emptiness. I was able to be more present and engaged in my work, and I found that I was able to make a greater impact in the lives of my clients. I was able to enjoy my personal life more and to be there for my family and friends in a meaningful way.

The journey of soul care is not a one-time event. It’s an ongoing process of filling yourself up so that you can pour into others. It’s about creating rhythms and practices that nourish your soul and keep you grounded in your faith. It’s about recognizing that you are a temple of the Holy Spirit and that you have a responsibility to care for yourself so that you can fulfill the calling that God has placed on your life.

The concept of soul care is rooted in the life and teachings of Jesus. Throughout the Gospels, we see Jesus taking time to withdraw and to pray, to rest and to recharge. He modeled for us the importance of caring for our souls so that we can be effective in our ministry and in our daily lives. In Mark 1:35, we read, “Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.” Jesus knew the importance of filling himself up so that he could pour into others. He understood that soul care was essential to living a life of meaning and purpose.

As we embark on this journey of soul care, it’s important to assess how full we feel in this season of our lives. Are we running on empty, or are we filled up and ready to pour into others? It’s important to identify the things that drain us and the things that fill us up. It’s important to create rhythms and practices that nourish our souls and keep us grounded in our faith. And it’s important to recognize that soul care is not a luxury; it’s a necessity.

My hope and prayer for you is that you will embark on this journey of soul care with an open heart and mind. That you will take the time to assess how full you feel in this season of your life, and that you will make the necessary changes to fill yourself up. That you will create rhythms and practices that nourish your soul and keep you grounded in your faith. And that you will live a life of meaning and purpose, rooted in the teachings of Jesus.

Let’s learn to fill ourselves up so that we can pour into others. Let’s discover the importance of soul care and how to apply it to our lives. Let’s live a life of meaning and purpose, rooted in the teachings of Jesus.

Debra Fileta is a licensed professional counselor, national speaker, relationship expert, and author of Choosing Marriage, True Love Dates, Love in Every Season, Are You Really OK?, and Married Sex. She’s also the host of the hotline-style Love + Relationships podcast. Her popular relationship advice blog, TrueLoveDates.com, reaches millions of people with the message of healthy relationships. Connect with her on Facebook, Instagram, or Twitter, or book an online session.

Taken from Soul Care by Debra Fileta. Copyright © 2024. Used by permission of Harvest House Publishers. 

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