13 min read ⭑

Jodie Berndt enjoys writing books (like her bestselling “Praying the Scriptures” series) and teaching about marriage and family — whether on podcasts or national media outlets. But what she enjoys even more is loving God and her family, serving her local church and babysitting her five grandchildren. By living out what she teaches, Jodie encourages other Christian women to, as the Bible puts it, “bear fruit in old age” (see Ps. 92:14) by pursuing joy, celebrating grace and living on purpose while surrendering everything to God. She believes everything we do in life can be a gift from us to God — whether we’re sorting through piles of laundry, trying to fill our relationships with a little more kindness or navigating a tough career decision. Join us now for a conversation all about prayer (in the big and little moments), biblical hospitality, swing dancing, finding rest in the busyness and books and Bible reading plans that can help us see even more of God’s heart.

QUESTION #1: ACQUAINT

There’s much more to food than palate and preference. How does a go-to meal at your favorite hometown restaurant reveal the true you behind the web bio?

We moved all over the country for Robbie’s job when our children were growing up (I think people wondered if we were in Witness Protection), so our string of favorite meals stretches from burgers and fries at Houston’s in Atlanta to Sunday brunch at the Hotel del Coronado in California and the jumbo-lump crabcakes at Coastal Grill in Virginia Beach.

Honestly, though? My favorite go-to meal, especially if we’re dining with friends, is at home.

Don’t get me wrong. I am not a great cook. But I love the prep that comes with hosting a dinner — from cleaning the house (a job I truly enjoy) to arranging the flowers, setting a pretty table and welcoming neighbors and friends. The actual food we will eat is often an afterthought.

The Bible is full of dinner party imagery, like God preparing a table for us in Psalm 23 and Wisdom setting her table in Proverbs 9 as an invitation to insight and understanding. As an HGTV wannabe, I love the detailed design of the table in the tabernacle, a piece of furniture that represented God’s presence and provision (see Ex. 37).

I realize my fascination with thoughtfully prepared tables is not the norm in a culture that’s more drawn to Netflix and takeout. But if we meet in real life and I invite you to come over for dinner, don’t worry. It won’t just be pretty napkins and flowers; there will also be food to enjoy. I can make a mean crabcake, I’ve been perfecting my salmon, and I’m comfortable with at least 23 recipes that revolve around chicken. We’ll have something good.

(But if you offer to bring a side dish or an app, I won’t turn you down.)

QUESTION #2: REVEAL

We’ve all got quirky proclivities and out-of-the-way interests. So what are yours? What so-called “nonspiritual” activity (or activities) do you love engaging in, which also helps you find essential spiritual renewal?

I like to swing dance with my husband, Robbie.

I am not a good dancer (the last fellow I danced with who was not Robbie told me he was impressed by the way I “cleared the area and made space” with my elbows). But on the theory that enthusiasm can cover a lot of ground where talent is lacking, I never hang back when I hear the first few notes of Bon Jovi’s “Livin’ on a Prayer.” Or whatever the band decides to start playing.

Robbie, who is actually a very good dancer, is right there with me. But it wasn’t always that way. One of our first (and most memorable) fights was over his unwillingness to dance at a party we’d been invited to early in our marriage. We didn’t know many people, and Robbie was not keen to draw attention to ourselves. But I had a cute dress on, and we had a babysitter on the clock! Why couldn’t we dance? Things got tense, and in a move that I am not proud of, I left.

That was not a good night. But that evening marked a turning point in our marriage as we realized how selfishly we had both been behaving, looking not to each other’s interests or desires but to our own. We resolved to start serving one another, as Galatians 5:13 puts it, humbly in love.

Have we always succeeded? No. But every time Robbie steers me onto the dance floor, I am grateful for how God met us that long-ago night and for all the ways he still meets us in everyday moments today.

QUESTION #3: CONFESS

Every superhero has a weakness. Every human too. We’re just good at faking it. But who are we kidding? We’re broken and in this thing together. So what’s your kryptonite, and how do you hide it?

I am not good at rest. I like being productive. When I am busy, I’m happy.

Except when I’m not.

Last summer, I hit a wall. “Praying the Scriptures for Your Marriage” was the final title in a three-book contract, and the launch hoopla had left me exhausted. I was ready to quit — and I told God so.

“Don’t say quit,” I sensed the Lord say. “Say, sabbatical.”

I had a vague idea of what a sabbatical was supposed to look like. Our minister was taking his own much-needed break and was reportedly thriving at bagpipe camp; another author I follow had vacated Instagram while he hiked the prayer ruins in Scotland. I’m not musically inclined or very outdoorsy, but I figured I’d think of something. I cleared my calendar of all speaking events, stashed my laptop and bid a temporary farewell to my social media friends.

Long story short, it didn’t turn out like I’d planned. We welcomed back-to-back grandbabies, our adult son moved in with his new bride and their puppy, and nearly every kitchen appliance decided to quit. Even the soap dispenser. And then the roof started leaking.

In my attempt to slow down and quiet my soul, I found myself busier — and more distracted — than ever. “I am such a failure!” I wailed to the Lord. “I know you said sabbatical, but I can’t figure out how!”

Softly, and without any fanfare, I sensed God’s reply. “I will meet you in the chaos,” he said.

What? Was that really God? I wasn’t sure, but I grabbed hold of the words like a life raft. So what if I never made it to bagpipe camp? God could still meet me. He could — and would — show up in the chaos.

I’m not sure at what point I began to sense that my soul was content, but when I stopped trying to force myself into sabbatical mode (You need to rest! You have to pray more! You should check into a monastery or at least a good spa!) and let God take over, he did. And while I’m still learning what real rest looks like, I’ve discovered that it’s not up to me. God is the one who refreshes my soul (see Ps. 23); my job is simply to be alert to his presence — even at the kitchen sink with my new soap dispenser — because that’s where we experience “fullness of joy” (Ps. 16:11).

QUESTION #4: FIRE UP

Tell us about your toil. How are you investing your professional time right now? What’s your current obsession? And why should it be ours?

I have two current obsessions: My family and my church.

After more than two decades of writing and speaking and doing “all the things” that I thought would be impactful for God, I sensed his nudge to lean into the confines of my little world in Virginia Beach. Specifically, I felt called to step into a leadership role with our church’s women’s ministry (where I teach a Bible study) and to babysit for my grandkids.

At first, I worried that the move smacked of laziness, or even like throwing in the towel on what has been a beautiful public ministry. But two things happened to make me comfortable in this current role.

The first was a growing awareness of what looks (to me, anyway) like “celebrity culture” in Christianity. People wanting to “drive engagement” and “build platforms” and get book deals and invitations to the big-name events. I saw what that did to a few friends’ families, and I wanted no part.

The second realization paralleled the first, only it smacked of joy, rather than striving. I read about Jesus and his handful of followers during his brief time on earth, and about how he never sought out the prime invitations or seats at the galas; rather, he went for lepers, prostitutes and the other outcasts. Hardly the makings of a good marketing or PR team. If that “unseen” world captivated God’s heart, should it not captivate mine?

I have nothing against my “famous” Christian friends; I know God calls people to different stages. For me, though, in this current season, I love reading my commentaries to write my study on James, and I am very happy to be changing diapers.

QUESTION #5: BOOST

Cashiers, CEOs, contractors or customer service reps, we all need grace flowing into us and back out into the world. How does the Holy Spirit invigorate your work? And how do you know it’s God when it happens?

People sometimes ask me how I start writing a book. Where do the ideas come from? How do I know if they’re any good? Is there a way to tell whether a new venture is from God?

Everyone in my family loves to surf — everyone, that is, except me. I like to sit in my beach chair and look at the ocean. Which is how I found myself wondering one day when the waves were particularly tasty (I’ve learned the lingo) why my husband passed on some rides that looked really good. Barreling, even.

I asked him about it.

“The waves might look great from the shore,” he explained. “And they might even look like they’re breaking well when they get up close. But once you start paddling, you can always tell if you need to bail or dig in for something that could be truly epic.”

It’s the same way with writing. So many things spark ideas, and I am forever jotting notes in my journal. I pray over them (I literally have one page marked “writing ideas” and another one titled “next steps”) and add extra thoughts as they occur. Then, when the timing feels right, I start to paddle.

Mindful of Paul’s counsel in Colossians 3:23, I try to paddle with all my heart. And I can tell, almost immediately, whether the “ride” has potential. Whether the Holy Spirit is in it. And whether a good word is meant to be published (or posted on Instagram) or whether God meant it only for me.

QUESTION #6: inspire

Scripture and tradition beckon us into the rich and varied habits that open our hearts to the presence of God. So let us in. Which spiritual practice is working best for you right now?

I was a teenager when I got my first copy of Richard Fosters’ “Celebration of Discipline.” And now, as a grandmother, I have devoured John Mark Comer’s “Practicing the Way.” You would think, what with my spiritual life (thus far) being bookended by these classics, I would have a better grasp of what it looks like to connect with God through practices like worship, meditation and fasting.

Alas, the further along I get in my spiritual journey, the more distance it seems I have left to cover. There are so many disciplines — habits — I have yet to truly explore.

But there are two things currently shaping my friendship with God: walking and Sabbath.

As a lifelong runner who only took up walking when her knees began to advise it, I have found myself both frustrated and delighted by this new practice. Frustrated because (light bulb) it takes a lot longer to cover the distance. And delighted because the slower pace affords time to truly reflect, pray and listen to God.

Sabbath has been trickier to define. I’ve always tried to steer clear of heavy lifting on Sundays, but that seemed more legalistic than refreshing. I felt like I was missing the point (sort of like when I’d step on the scale after a day of fasting, hoping for some reward). But two years ago, when I resolved to take a true sabbatical (and failed, at first), I learned that Sabbath doesn’t have to be a one-day event. It can happen anytime, and we can take it in chunks. Three hours on a Thursday, with nothing to do but spend time with God, breathed more life into my soul than any decision to forego doing laundry post-church. Likewise, meeting God in my kitchen, in the coffee line or while I’m strolling with a grandbaby can be holy time. Sabbath time.

QUESTION #7: FOCUS

Looking backward, considering the full sweep of your unique faith journey and all you encountered along the way, what top three resources stand out to you? What changed the game and changed your heart? What radically altered your life? What changed your reality?

My top three resources are these: Moms in Prayer, “Unseen” by Sara Hagerty and “With Christ in the School of Prayer” by Andrew Murray (with the honorable mention going to “How to Pray” by Pete Greig).

Moms in Prayer (momsinprayer.org) equips moms to pray for their kids and their schools, using a four-step format meant to be completed in one hour a week. (Call me legalistic, but I love a good agenda, and as a child of the charismatic renewal, when a prayer meeting starts and ends on time, I am both happy and surprised.) Moms in Prayer showed me how to use Scripture as a starting place for my conversations with God. If I met you in an elevator, I’d put it like this: “When we allow the Bible to shape our desires and give voice to our prayers, we release God’s provision and partner with him in accomplishing his best purposes in the lives of the people we love.”

“Unseen” — which is about meeting God in the middle minutes of our days and knowing he sees us — is a transformational work. I loved the message so much that I once held the book up on a crowded Delaware beach and announced to everyone within earshot (and to my children’s mortification) that this was the “best book on the beach.” But that’s another story.

Most of my favorite books are by dead authors, and Andrew Murray might be at the top of the list. “With Christ in the School of Prayer” builds on the premise that the more we abide in him and grow into his likeness, the more our lives — and our prayers — will reflect his. It’s good stuff, and time-tested.

We all have things we cling to to survive (or even thrive) in tough times — times like these! Name one resource you’re savoring and/or finding indispensable in this current season, and tell us what it’s doing for you.

I am a daily Bible reader. I’m also one of those uptight people who likes having a plan. When I got my hands on my first “Read the Bible in a Year” handout in college — a xeroxed page that came with boxes to check — I was hooked.

I’d probably read through the Bible 20 times when I heard about the Bible in One Year by Nicky Gumble. I loved getting the readings and commentary delivered to my inbox each morning, and the fact that the plan drew from three different sections of Scripture every day kept things lively. If I felt bogged down in, say, Numbers, the fact that something from Psalms or Matthew showed up on the same plate made it all very palatable.

I still recommend that particular plan (it’s available as an app now, which is fun), but as I’m getting older (and OK, slower), I’m learning to live life outside the boxes and savor God’s Word. To read it in shorter pieces. To reflect on the essential message in a handful of verses and let them settle into my soul.

That’s where my new favorite resource has been transformational. “Search the Scriptures” by Alan Stibbs guides you through the whole Bible … over three years. The slower pace is a gift, as are the handful of questions, cross-references and study notes Stibbs offers each day.

“Search the Scriptures” is a treasure. Be advised, though: The volume is nearly 550 pages, making it doorstop material. I took mine to Kinkos and had it chopped into three sections, each one spiral bound. (You’re welcome.)

QUESTION #8: dream

God is continually stirring new things in each of us. So give us the scoop! What’s beginning to stir in you but not yet fully awakened? What can we expect from you in the future?

After more than 20 years of writing and speaking about the power of Scripture to shape our thoughts, desires and conversations with God, I am sensing a pivot. I’m not saying “never” to another book about how to pray (I’ve tried that resolution a few times already), but as I watch my adult daughters raise our grandkids — while juggling an ever-changing array of needs in their marriages, homes and careers — I am thinking about new ways to equip young mothers to parent (and pray) with confidence.

I’m working with a national ministry to develop a few helpful resources. I won’t spill all the beans, but I will say that these offerings are shaping up to be both attractive and accessible, the sort of thing you might gift at a baby shower, ponder during a 3 a.m. wake-up with a new baby, or download to watch or listen to while you’re cooking dinner or waiting in the carpool line.

And there may be something for grandparents too. I’ll never forget praying 1 Timothy 6:18 over one of our grandsons just before his baby brother was born. That verse talks about being “rich in good deeds … generous and willing to share.” As I asked God to make this little boy gracious to his sibling (sharing toys, pacifiers and even his mother’s embrace), God expanded my vision. I “saw” these boys as young men and pictured them being generous to one another with things like money, time and encouragement.

Who among us would not want our grandchildren (or our children) to care for one another like that?

Like Jodie, do you ever feel like you’re just not that good at practicing Sabbath — or any kind of rest? Research says you’re not alone, with around 21% of men and 26% of women saying they “always feel rushed,” according to 2006 data. (And with recent technological advances and heightened expectations for getting things done fast, perhaps those percentages would be even higher today.)

If you’ve been feeling rushed and stressed — like you have no time to rest and be still — here’s a prayer to start your day, taken from Psalm 23 and Matthew 11:28-30:

“Heavenly Father, thank you for being my shepherd. I don’t need anything else because I have you. Right now, make me lie down in green pastures, lead me beside quiet waters and restore my soul. I confess that I’ve been weary and heavy-laden lately, so I come to you just as you invite me to so you can give me rest. Help me take your yoke and learn from you and receive rest for my soul. Show me today — in personal and practical ways — how your yoke is easy and your burden is light. I love you, Lord. In Jesus’ name, amen.”

Jodie Berndt is the bestselling author of the Praying the Scriptures series, which includes volumes for children, teens, adult children, life and marriage. A popular event speaker and Bible teacher, Jodie has been featured on many national media outlets, including Focus on the Family, Fox News and a variety of marriage and family-oriented podcasts. Jodie writes about prayer and other family topics in her email newsletter and on Instagram. She and her husband, Robbie, have four adult children and five grandchildren. They live in Virginia Beach, Virginia.

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