Alexandra Hoover
9 min read ⭑
“Offense is such a necessary topic, and I want to help women see it for what it really is — not just a reaction, but a mirror that reveals where our hearts still need healing. So many of us are quietly weighed down by what we won’t name, and I believe Jesus invites us to a freedom that runs deeper than just ‘getting over it.’ For a long time, I thought moving on meant ignoring what hurt. But I’ve learned that God doesn’t rush our healing; He restores us through it.”
Alexandra Hoover is a woman who is dedicated to seeing people thrive in hope, healing and mission. She’s a best-selling author, a sought-after national speaker, and a passionate ministry leader who has given her life to helping women grow in their relationship with God and live with wholeness and purpose in him. In her new book, You Can Let Go, Alexandra guides readers in overcoming offense, making peace with past hurts and disappointments, and experiencing the abundance Jesus offers. Alexandra also serves on staff at a church in Charleston, South Carolina, where she lives with her family.
In this interview, Alexandra opens up about learning to unclench her fists and surrender control and her desire for contingency plans. She talks about what happens when the Holy Spirit shows up in her work, infusing her with peace and power. She also describes what the practice of stillness looks like in her busy season of motherhood, encouraging readers that rest can be found even in the middle of activity. Keep reading to learn more about what motivates her, challenges her and keeps her on course in her spiritual walk.
QUESTION #1: ACQUAINT
Food is always about more than food; it's also about home and people and love. So, how does a go-to meal at your favorite hometown restaurant reveal the true you behind your web bio?
Home has always had a flavor to me, and for me, it tastes like Venezuela. Though I now live in Charleston, South Carolina, far from where I grew up, I still go searching for pieces of home wherever I can find them: a small Latin restaurant tucked away, a familiar dish, or even just the smell of something simmering that takes me back.
Some of my richest memories are from summers spent with my aunts, away from all the noise. My grandmother’s kitchen was the center of everything. You could smell her chicken before you ever reached the door — garlic, onions and peppers filling the air, windows open, laughter echoing through the house. No matter how little we had, there was always food, joy and people gathered around the table. I don’t cook as much Venezuelan food as I’d like these days, but it’s become a kind of reminder for me — a starting point. It calls me back to living authentically and moving at a slower pace, to creating spaces for my family that feel full of warmth and belonging. For me, food has always been more than food. It’s memory. It’s laughter. It’s home. And now, I’m crying.
Yuri Antonenko; Unsplash
QUESTION #2: REVEAL
What “nonspiritual” activity have you found to be quite spiritual, after all? What quirky proclivity, out-of-the-way interest, or unexpected pursuit refreshes your soul?
I’ve always been a walker. There’s something about getting outside, putting one foot in front of the other, that helps me breathe again. I recently got a weighted vest, and I’m obsessed. Most days you’ll find me running or walking through my neighborhood, checking on the turtles in the ponds nearby like they’re old friends. I send pictures of them to my friends and have even tried to name them. I can’t help myself. They’re steady and unbothered, which is probably why I love them so much. And then there’s the sky. I’m completely obsessed: the clouds, the colors, the way the light shifts. I love how I get to choose what to look for and when. Some days it’s the turtles, some days it’s the sky, and sometimes it’s just the quiet. One of my favorite runs is across the Isle of Palms bridge. The wind hitting my face feels almost magical, like creation itself is breathing with me. The older I get, the more this rhythm has become one of the most spiritual things I do. It slows me down, grounds me and reminds me that all of it — the movement, the noticing, the beauty — is a gift. I guess you could say I’m good at noticing the magic in the little things. Honestly, I live for it.
QUESTION #3: CONFESS
Every superhero has a weakness; every human, too. We’re just good at faking it. But who are we kidding? We’re all broken and in this thing together. So, what’s your kryptonite and how do you confront its power?
If I’m being honest, my kryptonite is control — or, really, my need for security. I took this test recently called the Primal Question, and mine came back as just that: security. And it tracks. I want to feel safe, to know that things are okay, that the people I love are cared for, and that the ground isn’t going to suddenly shift underneath me. I actually had an intern back in 2018 make a joke once about how I always have a contingency plan. He said, “You probably have a duffle bag ready to go, just in case.” We all laughed, but I remember saying, “Oh my gosh, that’s actually true.” And now, that moment always pops into my mind whenever I start to feel a little swirly or anxious. So much of my life has been shaped by that longing. I like order, predictability and steadiness. And when things feel uncertain, I find myself trying to manage, fix, or plan my way back to peace. But what I’ve learned, most times the hard way, is that control isn’t peace. It’s protection disguised as care. There have been seasons when I’ve tried to hold it all together — ministry, motherhood, emotions, everything — believing I could keep chaos out if I just did enough. But God keeps inviting me to unclench my hands, to trust that he’s big enough to hold what I can’t.
QUESTION #4: FIRE UP
Tell us about your toil. How are you investing your professional time right now? What’s your current obsession? And why should it be ours?
Right now, most of my work is centered around helping women work through offense and hurt in their lives so they can move forward with God. My new book, “You Can Let Go,” was born out of one of the hardest seasons of my own life, a time when God asked me to stop carrying what wasn’t mine to hold anymore and taught me to walk out of the trap that is offense. Offense is such a necessary topic, and I want to help women see it for what it really is — not just a reaction, but a mirror that reveals where our hearts still need healing. So many of us are quietly weighed down by what we won’t name, and I believe Jesus invites us to a freedom that runs deeper than just “getting over it.” For a long time, I thought moving on meant ignoring what hurt. But I’ve learned that God doesn’t rush our healing; He restores us through it. Writing this book became a way to walk women back to the heart of Jesus, to remind them that they’re safe to let go because he’s already holding what broke them. It can’t hold us hostage anymore. These days, I spend my time teaching, writing and pastoring at our church here in Charleston. It’s good and holy work. I love it.
QUESTION #5: BOOST
Whether we’re Cashiers or CEOs, contractors or customer service reps, we all need God’s love flowing into us and back out into the world. How does the Holy Spirit invigorate your work? And how do you know it’s God when it happens?
I can always tell when the Holy Spirit is breathing on my work. It feels like peace and power showing up in the same moment. Most of the time, I don’t even realize it’s him until after the words are written or the message is shared and someone says, “That was exactly what I needed.” That’s usually when I smile and think, Yep, that wasn’t me. For me, inspiration often comes in the middle of ordinary moments — in between parenting, pastoring or writing. I’ll be out walking or journaling, and suddenly something clicks: a line, a story, a phrase I could never have crafted on my own. The words feel alive, like they’ve been waiting for me to slow down long enough to hear them. There’s this deep sense of partnership that happens when I write or speak under his leading. The Holy Spirit takes what’s raw or half-formed and turns it into something that speaks straight to the heart. It’s humbling and holy to realize that the God who created everything would use my everyday life, my stories, my voice, to remind someone else that he’s still near.
QUESTION #6: inspire
Scripture and tradition beckon us into the rich and varied habits that open our hearts to the presence of God. So, let us in. Which spiritual practice is working best for you in this season?
Honestly, stillness, though it might not look the way you’d think. I’m a busy mom with three very active kids and a full plate in my own calling and life, so stillness doesn’t always mean silence and long quiet times. Sometimes, it’s a few deep breaths in between school drop-offs or a slow cup of coffee before the house wakes up. Those small pauses have become sacred moments where I let my soul catch up to my body. But stillness for me also looks like active rest. Some of my favorite walks have become the places where I hear God the clearest, where I think, pray and just notice. The rhythm of my steps, the breeze and the open sky all become a kind of leveling, a reminder that he’s near and I’m safe. For a long time, my prayer life was full of words and striving, but lately, it’s been more about listening and being. Whether I’m sitting or walking, those quiet moments slow me down and remind me that God’s presence isn’t something I have to chase — it’s something I get to settle into.
QUESTION #7: FOCUS
Looking backward, considering the full sweep of your unique faith journey and all you encountered along the way, what top three resources stand out to you? What changed reality and changed your heart?
That’s a tough one because God has met me through so many words and seasons, but a few really stand out. First, “Emotionally Healthy Spirituality” by Peter Scazzero. It gave me language for what I’d been living, that emotional health and spiritual depth belong together. It helped me realize that healing is part of discipleship and that slowing down with God is never wasted.
Then there’s “Traveling Mercies” by Anne Lamott. Her honesty about faith, doubt and grace wrecked me in the best way. She reminded me that faith isn’t for the polished or put-together, but it’s for real people learning to trust God in the middle of their mess.
Finally, “The Broken Way” by Ann Voskamp. That book met me in a season of loss and showed me that brokenness can actually become a doorway to deeper communion with Christ. It helped me see that pain and beauty often live side by side, and both can lead us closer to him. Those voices helped me see God as near, kind and endlessly patient.
Certain things can be godsends, helping us survive, even thrive, in our fast-paced world. Does technology ever help you this way? Has an app ever boosted your spiritual growth? If so, how?
I have kind of a love-and-boundaries (hate) relationship with technology. It can be a distraction really quickly, but it can also be such a gift when I use it with intention. Lately, I’ve been using the Lectio 365 app, and it’s been such a steady companion in the middle of full days. I’ll listen while I’m getting ready in the morning or winding down at night. It’s short and reflective, and it always leads me back to God’s presence before I dive into the noise of the day. I love that it slows me down — the prayers, the pauses, even the background music. It all helps me breathe and remember what matters.
I also use the YouVersion Bible app a lot, especially for devotionals and verse reminders. Sometimes a verse notification hits my phone at the exact moment I need it.
Technology can pull us in a hundred directions, but when I let it, it can also point me back to stillness, back to God. It’s all about how I use it and the space I create around it.
QUESTION #8: dream
God’s continually stirring new things in each of us. So, give us the scoop! What’s beginning to stir in you but not yet fully awakened? What can we expect from you in the future?
That’s such a good question, and, honestly, I feel like I’m right in the middle of that stirring. This past season has been about slowing down enough to listen and not rushing what God’s doing. I sense him inviting me to go deeper — in my writing, in ministry and in how I show up for people. After “You Can Let Go,” I feel a growing desire to help people walk out what forgiveness and freedom actually look like in everyday life. Not just in the big moments, but in the ordinary ones, the hard conversations, the quiet healing, the in-between. I think what’s stirring is the next layer of that message: helping people build lives that reflect peace, not just long for it. There’s a little fear in that — stepping into new spaces, trusting God with what’s next — but mostly, there’s this quiet excitement. I don’t know exactly what it will look like yet, or how, but I know this: I want to keep writing and teaching from a place of real life, real grace and real hope.
Alexandra describes how her prayer life has changed over the years, moving away from words and striving into a place of listening and being. She talks about the practice of stillness and says, “Whether I’m sitting or walking, those quiet moments slow me down and remind me that God’s presence isn’t something I have to chase — it’s something I get to settle into.” Carving out moments of stillness in his presence in the middle of active days can remind us that we are always held. When you quiet yourself before God today, ask him to make you aware of his presence that is already there, waiting for you to settle in. Spend time just sitting in his presence, still and silent, without words, letting his love transform you.
Alexandra Hoover is a best-selling author, speaker and pastor passionate about helping women grow in their relationship with God and live with wholeness and purpose in him. Through her writing and teaching, she helps women overcome offense and hurt, make peace with their past, and step into the freedom Jesus offers. Alexandra serves on staff at a local church in Charleston, South Carolina, and is the author of You Can Let Go.