Carol McLeod
12 min read ⭑
“My particular battle against depression has been three-fold: I talk to a counselor, I go to a medical doctor and I fight depression with my faith. Today, when my arch-enemy, depression, tries to force its way into my soul, I can use the three-pronged strategy to answer the door and refuse his entrance.”
QUESTION #1: ACQUAINT
There’s much more to food than palate and preference. How does a go-to meal at your favorite hometown restaurant reveal the true you behind the web bio?
I guess you could call me a “northern girl with a southern heart.” Although I was born and raised in a tiny town nestled among the rolling hills of Western New York, I have always felt more at home in the deep South among the magnolias, humid summer afternoons, and firefly evenings. I married a southern boy and instantly traded the second person plural from “you guys” to “y’all.”
Thanksgiving has become a recognized art in the family McLeod. The daughters-in-law beg for the heirloom recipes, and my corn pudding is legendary. Thanksgiving dinner at my street address holds a lovely blend of the north and south, “you guys” and “y’all,” and the debate between “pi-kahn” or “pee-kan” pie.
The roasted turkey is, of course, the masterpiece of the day and it roasts overnight in my oversized oven. We awake in the early morning hours of the fourth Thursday in November to the unmistakable and much-anticipated aroma of the 30-pound, all-organic bird.
Three types of dressing are devoured before the day is over — sausage and apple stuffing, gluten-free stuffing and vegetarian stuffing. We McLeods are a varied bunch and are quite particular about dietary preferences even on this highly gluttonous day of the year.
The sweet potato casserole topped with pretzels and cranberries mocks all other competitors, Aunt Ann’s butter beans simmer on a back burner for hours and I am forbidden to share the family mashed potato recipe with anyone who is not a card-carrying McLeod. However, I can assure you that those pure white mounds of starch will improve your prayer life!
But the sweetest part of this annual celebration is not the pumpkin pie piled high with freshly made whipped cream nor is it Nanny’s seven-layer chocolate cake, but it is the people around the table for whom I am deeply grateful. These are the ones who turn any meal into a feast!
Priscilla Du Preez; Unsplash
QUESTION #2: REVEAL
We’ve all got quirky proclivities and out-of-the-way interests. So what are yours? What so-called “nonspiritual” activities do you love and help you find spiritual renewal?
I am utterly amazed at the joy that only happens at Christmas.
I’m astounded that the entire world stops to celebrate a holiday they are incapable of comprehending! The miracle of this sacred season invites those who have not yet embraced the heart of Christmas to splash in the joy and they willingly respond!
I wish I had been there to hear the angels sing, to see the shepherds joyful dance, and to gently ask Mary if I could hold her baby. I wish I could have kissed his sweet face and smelled his infant breath so fresh from heaven!
I have come to believe that Christmas was always meant to be a lifestyle and not a fleeting holiday.
And so when I was in college, I made an audacious determination. I, as a self-diagnosed Christmas-carrier, intended to extend the season of holly jolly, joyful and triumphant, and glistening tree-tops for three glorious months. October 1 became my first official day of the Christmas music season, and that decision has followed me to this very day.
I decided to sing the songs of Christmas even if no one else sang with me.
“Oh, tidings of comfort and joy!” “Sleep in heavenly peace.”
And then, I had a baby boy of my very own. As I held my first son in my arms, I began to sing to him, and what was it that came out of my heart?
“Be near me, Lord Jesus, I ask Thee to stay, close by me forever and love me, I pray!”
“Have yourself a merry little Christmas!”
“When you’re worried and you can’t sleep ... just count your blessings instead of sheep!”
The miracle of Christmas assures all of us that life will forever smack of eternity and the joy of his dear presence.
The melodies of Christmas might have been composed within the constraints of time, but they will be sung for all of eternity.
QUESTION #3: CONFESS
Every superhero has a weakness. Every human, too. We’re just good at faking it. But who are we kidding? We’re broken and in this thing together. So what’s your kryptonite and how do you hide it?
The words “depressed” and “Christian” are not mutually exclusive. I know this to be true because, for many years, I was one. A depressed Christian. Even now, over 30 years past the initial onset, depression is still the unwelcome enemy that relentlessly knocks at the door of my heart.
My husband and I had two lively little boys, and we deeply desired to enlarge our family. However, every time I became pregnant, the baby died inside my womb between 12 and 20 weeks in gestation. I experienced this nauseating and heartbreaking pain five gut-wrenching times. Four of those precious little lives I held in my hand.
The pain was vicious and real, and I tumbled into the black hole of depression. My hormones were raging, my arms were empty and my heart was broken. I went to my medical doctor and he prescribed an anti-depressant. A counselor helped me to peel back the layers of my pain. However, I was still depressed — agonizingly so.
Into this circumstantial torrent of emotional pain, I then developed an addiction. The addiction that consumed my every waking hour was not alcohol, food or medication. The addiction that held me in its power was the Word of God.
I played Legos with my little boys with the Bible opened between my legs; I did the dishes with the Bible open on the kitchen counter. I even laminated 3x5 cards with scriptures and took them in the shower with me. The depression that had so bullied my life abated before my circumstances ever changed.
My particular battle against depression has been three-fold — I talk to a counselor, I go to a medical doctor and I fight it with my faith. Today, when my arch-enemy, depression, tries to force its way into my soul, I can use the three-pronged strategy to answer the door and refuse his entrance.
QUESTION #4: FIRE UP
Tell us about your toil. How are you investing your professional time right now? What’s your obsession? And why should it be ours?
When I was battling aggressive cancer, I was stunned by a verse of Scripture that propelled me to live fully despite my unknown future. “For David, after he had served the purpose of God in his own generation, fell asleep” (Acts 13:36, ESV).
The first breathtaking fact in this verse is that the Holy Spirit was talking about David 1,000 years after he lived! How amazing is that? Yes! I want to live a life of impact that compelling!
Secondly, I was moved by the knowledge that we all have purposes that are unique to our own generation.
If I had lived before the Reformation, I would have been a scribe that copied the Word of God onto parchment. If I had lived during the 1800s, I would have traveled across the Rocky Mountains to tell people about the saving love of Jesus Christ.
But that’s not when the Lord ordained for me to serve him. I am alive today, in the first part of the 20th century, and will use everything unique to my generation to bring joy and hope to a world in pain. I will employ blogging, podcasting, the publishing industry, radio, TV and social media to tell the story that never grows old.
My 15th book, “Meanwhile: Meeting God in the Wait,” is a rich study of the life of Joseph in the Old Testament. A “meanwhile” is that period between trauma and God’s visible answer. It can also be understood as the agonizing wait that occurs after you pray and pray and pray and pray — and yet still nothing has changed. A meanwhile is when you must decide if you believe that Romans 8:28 means what it says.
Meanwhile also has an accompanying video Bible teaching series of eight lessons as well as a leader’s guide.
Everyone is waiting for something. The life of Joseph reveals how to wait well.
QUESTION #5: BOOST
Cashiers, CEOs, contractors or customer service reps, we all need grace flowing into us and back out into the world. How does the Holy Spirit invigorate your work? And how do you know it’s God when it happens?
I have often jokingly yet earnestly explained to unsuspecting folks that the following phrase has never crossed my mind: “Oh! I could make that!”
In short, I am creatively challenged. I buy baked goods rather than make them. I memorize piano pieces rather than play by ear. My home might look like it’s out of a designer book, and that’s because it is — but you can be sure that I was not the one who designed it. The words “cross-stitch,” “crafting” and “crocheting” are all foreign phrases to me.
However, when my fingers hit the keys of my computer, magic happens.
I have wanted to be a writer since I was 7 years old and read “Little House in the Big Woods.” My calling was certain, and I spent the next 40 years reading great books, writing in journals and pensively dreaming about the day when I, like Laura, would be a published author.
However, I can also assure you, that my choice ideas and most gripping writing have been birthed during days of trauma and pain. Tragedy has bestowed content to write and God has touched it with his wisdom. Disappointment has enlarged my ability to communicate and Scripture has refined it. The wounds of life have been the productive soil of creativity, and time has been the fertilizer.
I’ve scripted most of my books and many of my articles with tears cascading down my cheeks and my chest heaving with anxiety. I was determined not to waste my pain but to use it as a springboard for impact.
QUESTION #6: inspire
Scripture and tradition beckon us into the rich and varied actions that open our hearts to the presence of God. So spill it, which spiritual practice is workin’ best for you right now?
Oh! How the music of my faith touches the deepest parts of my soul.
I am in awe as I sing the ancient hymns that thousands of battle-weary believers have sung before me. I can’t help but weep as I worship in my car with the melodies and lyrics that touch the generations of my children and grandchildren. And as I recall the Scripture choruses of my young adult years, I remember the power of singing the Bible — word for beloved word. And may I just say that I’m the very best shower singer you ever did hear!
As I sing, my view of heaven comes into focus and the problems of my current situation shrink. As the thoughts of my Savior rest melodically in my heart, I’m strengthened and propelled in my calling. As I allow the forces of darkness to hear my strains of joy and hope, I find myself standing at attention to all that he is and all that he is capable of doing on my behalf.
When I sing even a simple song of praise, I am more aware of his presence than I am of my pain. Truly, God does inhabit the praises of his people. As I choose to sing above the storm and even in the fires of life, I experience his presence where there is always fullness of joy.
I’ve discovered that he is just one worship song away. I now know that as I praise him with my audible voice, as weak and as shaky as it might be, he is delighted with me!
QUESTION #7: FOCUS
Our email subscribers get free ebooks featuring our favorite resources — lots of things that have truly impacted our faith lives. But you know about some really great stuff, too. What are three resources that have impacted you?
Only 3? How is that even possible? But I’ll try.
Elisabeth Elliot is one of my heroines of the faith. I heard her speak when I was a young woman attending a Christian university and was amazed by her candor, her trust in God, and her total commitment to Scripture. I have since read every book that she has ever written. In 2019, when I was going through a devastating circumstance with one of our children, I discovered that there had been a book published posthumously by Elisabeth titled, “Suffering Is Never for Nothing.” This book holds rich and vital theology on the topic of suffering. My view of suffering was revolutionized and refined. My heart had, once again, been comforted by the writings of dear Elisabeth.
For several years, I hated the title of the book “The Insanity of God,” and therefore, I refused to read it. I thought that it was extremely audacious to use the word “insanity” to describe a portion of God’s character. Honestly, I was offended. But then, my daughter-in-law read the book, and it so consumed her that even as a young mom of four small children, she stayed up until 4 in the morning reading this missionary tale. She convinced me that I should read it and so I read it to keep peace in the family. I, too, stayed up all night reading this formerly offensive book written by a missionary whose passionate goal was to figure out why God allowed suffering. I was beautifully broken by this book, and it softened my heart toward the suffering church.
I’m addicted to the podcast “The Bible Recap” with Tara Leigh Cobble. It’s generally less than 15 minutes long, and it simply recaps the daily Bible reading in the One Year Chronological Bible. For a Bible girl like me, this is just what the Holy Spirit ordered!
We all have things we cling to to survive (or thrive) in tough times. Name one resource you’ve found indispensable in this current season — and tell us what it’s done for you.
I recently found a glorious book by a young author named Nicole Zasowski. I interviewed Nicole for my podcast and found a kindred spirit in this marriage and family therapist who has discovered that God is as present in our joy as he is in our suffering. I have long believed that the most breathtaking part of my life’s journey is discovered at the crossroads of joy and sorrow. Nicole has confirmed this in her stunning book “What if It’s Wonderful?”
One of the most important determinants in my choice to read a book is that it contains solid, respectable theology and that the author has been through something challenging. I believe that struggles are the number one qualifier to be used by God. Nicole has struggled deeply through human pain and still believes that God is good and that he calls his people to celebrate his character.
She asks all of us as we encounter the easy days and hard moments in life, “What if it’s wonderful?”
QUESTION #8: dream
God is continually stirring new things in each of us. So give us the scoop! What’s beginning to stir in you but not yet fully awakened? What can we expect from you in the future?
During the final week of 2021, I was reading my Bible when my eyes came across the phrase “Buy my field” in Jeremiah 32:7, and it leaped off of the page into my heart.
The following week, the first week of 2022, I received an email from a woman who was a mere acquaintance. In other words, I do know who she is, but our paths rarely cross. She told me that the week prior, she had been reading Proverbs 31 when verse 16 jumped out at her: “She considers a field and buys it.”
The Holy Spirit whispered to her heart that this phrase was for Carol McLeod, and so this obedient “mere acquaintance” emailed it to me.
As I read this now-precious email, I didn’t know what the Lord was up to, but I knew that I was going to be buying a field in 2022 — whatever that meant!
Several weeks later, a Christian television station contacted me and asked if I would be interested in having a weekly TV show. I had found my field ... now I just needed to raise the funds to buy it!
Raising money has always been a challenge for me. I have dreamed big dreams in the past, have endeavored valiantly to raise the money for those exciting dreams and have been left spinning my tires in the quicksand of frustration and lack of finances.
As I prayed and pondered and talked with my staff and my board of directors, we believed that the Lord was asking us to move forward with the television project. When I announced it publicly at the end of March 2022, the finances came pouring in. The Lord provided the entire amount for six months of programming in less than one week’s time.
“The Joy Life” will premiere in September 2022 — about nine months after the Lord began speaking to me about it. Nine months — don’t miss the symbolism here. I’m giving birth to a TV show! This will provide a new way of communicating hope and joy to the men and women of my generation. I am “buying a field”!
There’s nothing quite like receiving a calling or instruction from the Lord — and then watching him provide exactly what you need to obey him. Just like Carol felt God leading her to “buy a field” (or a weekly TV show) and then saw him bring in the money she needed for it!
Have you ever seen God move like this in your life? How did it encourage your faith? When discouragement comes knocking, we can remind ourselves of how God has worked on our behalf in the past. Because that’s who he is — faithful. And that’s who he will continue to be.
“He who did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, how will he not also with him graciously give us all things?” (Romans 8:32, ESV).
Carol McLeod is a best-selling author and beloved Bible teacher. Meanwhile, Carol’s 15th book, released in 2022, and Rooms of a Mother’s Heart won the 2022 Blue Ridge Writer’s Conference Directors’ Choice award. Carol’s podcasts, A Jolt of Joy and Significant Women, are powerfully touching lives while her YouVersion devotions have over 3.4 million downloads. Carol’s blog is listed in the Top 50 Faith Blogs, and she writes a weekly column in Ministry Today. The first women’s chaplain at Oral Roberts University, she received the university’s prestigious Alumna of the Year award for Distinguished Service to God in 2021.
