Doug Wekenman
11 min read ⭑
“As Christians, we’re trying to follow a God we can’t see with a voice we can’t hear into a future we don’t know. And of all the questions people are asking, the most common question is some version of this one: What does God have planned for me next?”
Doug Wekenman doesn’t pretend to be the perfect father, husband or pastor. But he is serious about pursuing a perfect God who won’t give up on him or the people he ministers to. In addition to being the teaching pastor at Red Rocks Church in Austin, Texas, he’s the author of “What Does God Have Planned for Me Next?,” a no-nonsense guide to navigating the future with Jesus.
In today’s conversation, Doug is getting vulnerable about his nine-year addiction to pain pills and the pivotal roles that God’s Word, mentorship and cold plunging played in his healing journey. You’ll also discover the benefits of memorizing Scripture and how he practices self-control with his phone. He shared, we listened — and it’s all here.
QUESTION #1: ACQUAINT
Food is always about more than food; it’s also about home and people and love. So how does a go-to meal at your favorite hometown restaurant reveal the true you behind your web bio?
I’m going to take some liberty and tell you about a meal my mom used to make. The setting is the kitchen table of my childhood home in Carmel, Indiana, on a fall evening when I was 9 years old. My little brother Ryan and I were playing one-on-one football with Dad as the all-time quarterback. The air was crisp. The trees were yellow, red and other late September colors. And Mom finally called us in for dinner — chicken and rice with asparagus and the steamiest and cheesiest cream topping you’ve ever had. I can taste it as I type.
Honestly, this is the “scene” I go back to in my head when I think about the time I felt the most alive and free and energetic and excited about life — eating my favorite meal with the people I love the most. There was no fear of the future. No auditioning for a spot in the room. No guilt, shame, anxiety or worries of not having enough. Only talking, laughing, loving and being loved.
You know what it is? It’s the feeling of being a child — which I think is the feeling every adult is working so hard to rediscover. Maybe we’ll know the fullness of it again one day in heaven. For now, we get tastes of it. And I can taste it a little better every time I eat that chicken and rice with the cheesy asparagus.
Bryan Rodriguez; Unsplash
QUESTION #2: REVEAL
What “nonspiritual” activity have you found to be quite spiritual, after all? What quirky proclivity, out-of-the-way interest or unexpected pursuit refreshes your soul?
I’m an evangelist at heart, but not just for Jesus. An evangelist is somebody who passionately loves something and enthusiastically tries to get you to love it, too. So whether it’s Jesus or golfing or guitar or “Top Gun” — when I’m passionate about something, I get others passionate about it, too. This brings me to my cold plunge. For the record, I started taking ice baths before it was the “cool” thing to do, pun intended. And for me, it hasn’t just been a biohack that helped me overcome an addiction or a quick way to burn calories and lower inflammation. It’s also been a spiritual discipline that has done more to help my anxiety than anything else.
Here’s why.
When you hop in 40-degree water, your body immediately shifts into fight-or-flight mode by shocking your system. And for a moment, you truly think you’re going to die, cueing the hyperventilating and subtle panic. But then you start breathing, slowly and deeply, one inhale/exhale after the other. And if you keep going, something incredible begins to happen. Your mind and body begin to realize that it’s safe, and you start to feel very calm in your mind, focusing on nothing else but breathing.
I’ve trained my brain to realize that if it’s “OK” in 40-degree water, it’s OK in any other situation as well. And slowly but surely, it began to renew my mind, like Romans 12 describes, teaching me that I’m “OK” no matter what happens. The calmest part of my day is the three minutes while I’m doing the most intense and extreme thing I’ll experience all day. The Holy Spirit meets me in my cold plunge and has used it to teach me a peace that transcends understanding.
QUESTION #3: CONFESS
Every superhero has a weakness; every human, too. We’re just good at faking it. But who are we kidding? We’re all broken and in this thing together. So what’s your kryptonite, and how do you confront its power?
I was once having breakfast with my mentor when he casually asked me this question: “One day, when you have a lot to lose, which of these three things is most likely to be the reason — lust, greed or power?”
Just some light small talk to start the day.
I thought about it, knowing I’m susceptible to all three at any moment. But I took a deep breath and said: “Which category do substances fall under?”
I’ve dealt with chronic pain for two decades now. And for nine of those years, I struggled quietly with a prescription pain pill addiction — specifically, to Vicodin. It was helpful for the pain, and I justified it because a doctor in a white coat gave me a bottle of it every single month, but it also became my vice. So quick recap: For nine years, I was a pastor with a drug addiction. In case you feel alone — you’re not.
We’re all imperfect and broken people pursuing a perfect God, and I put myself at the top of that list. I’ve been sober for three years now, and continue to step further and further into freedom. I still struggle with chronic pain, but I believe healing will be part of my testimony in the near future, in Jesus’ name. Until then, I’m incredibly aware of my kryptonite. Ed Sheeran once penned these lyrics: “I’m well aware of certain things that can destroy a man like me. But with that said, give me one more.” The days of “one more refill” are gone. Jesus set me free, and I’m never going back. And I believe God’s power is made perfect in my weakness.
I don’t wear a cape as a pastor. Instead, I do my best to lead from my brokenness. Because here’s one thing I know for sure: God has only ever used broken people to change the world.
QUESTION #4: FIRE UP
Tell us about your toil. How are you investing your professional time right now? What’s your current obsession? And why should it be ours?
I love pastoral meetings. Not small talk — the real stuff. In the last 15 years, I’ve had a few thousand meetings pastoring real people through all the highs, lows, twists and turns life has to offer. All of them are beautifully different, but I noticed something: they’re the same in many ways as well.
“I know God has good plans for me, but I have no idea what they are.”
“I know the next chapter of my life is waiting, but I have no idea how to turn the page.”
“How do I hear from God?”
“How do I make a big decision with God?”
As Christians, we’re trying to follow a God we can’t see with a voice we can’t hear into a future we don’t know. And of all the questions people are asking, the most common question is some version of this one: What does God have planned for me next?
That question is the title of my new book.
It’s a personal topic for me because I know how it feels to hear so clearly from God — and I also know how it feels to pray and hear static from heaven. I’ve been confused about my calling, desperate for direction, and I’ve waited on the Lord in seasons that felt like they’d never end. I’ve also experienced firsthand the guidance and goodness of a very real God who I believe has good plans for you as well. That’s why I wrote this book — because I want you to experience all of it, and miss none of it.
QUESTION #5: BOOST
Whether we’re cashiers or CEOs, contractors or customer service reps, we all need God’s love flowing into us and back out into the world. How does the Holy Spirit invigorate your work? And how do you know it’s God when it happens?
The inspiration for my book was born one day when I had five back-to-back pastoral meetings with five very different people. I write about it in the book, and I’ll never forget it.
The first meeting was with a successful young woman stuck in the aftermath of childhood trauma, trying to figure out how to heal and forgive so she can move on. The second, a terrified college senior with $80,000 in student debt, desperate to know whether or not he should propose to his pregnant girlfriend. The third was a recently widowed, middle-aged man wrestling with how in the world to start over again. The fourth meeting was with a 25-year-old techie living in the heart of downtown Austin, stuck in a 10-year marijuana addiction, wondering what life would be like if he was sober. The fifth and final meeting was with a 36-year-old woman (one of my good friends) wondering if God ever planned on answering her lifelong prayer to start a family.
I wanted to describe my meeting marathon to you because this is where I find an endless source of inspiration: Having real talk with real people.
When I’m stuck in sermon prep, or I’m tempted to perform, I think about the people I’ve had the privilege of talking to over the years. I think about what they’re going through, how to encourage them and how to help them see Jesus in their situation. I think about my own struggles, and how if you write/preach from your own weaknesses, you’ll never run out of things to say. And when I do, I’m no longer trying to be impressive or caring what anybody thinks of my book. I’m just living in my purpose — not for approval, but from the love of God that I already have.
QUESTION #6: inspire
Scripture and tradition beckon us into the rich and varied habits that open our hearts to the presence of God. So let us in. Which spiritual practice is working best for you in this season?
I’ve recently become very passionate about memorizing Scripture. In a day and age where we have completely outsourced the job of our memories to our phones, challenging your brain to internalize the Word of God has a hundred different benefits. A few weeks ago, I decided to start memorizing Ephesians, and as of right now, I’m halfway through chapter 2. I’m well aware it will take me the rest of the year to accomplish my goal, but I’m OK with that because the journey is the entire point.
Here’s how I make sense of it: Memorizing Scripture is how you get it into your head, and internalizing Scripture is how you get it into your heart. Memorization is the first step — the challenge is to keep going. To think about it, meditate on it and mutter it under your breath until the words drop from your head to your heart. Once they’re in you, they begin to change you. As Hebrews tells us, Scripture is “piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow” (Heb. 4:12, ESV). The more you get the Word of God in you, the more it begins to change your life in a hundred different ways.
QUESTION #7: FOCUS
Looking backward, considering the full sweep of your unique faith journey and all you encountered along the way, what top three resources stand out to you? What changed reality and changed your heart?
I’ll never forget reading “Beautiful Outlaw” by John Eldredge, which describes the humanity of Jesus. It helped me see Jesus as a real person, not just a distant religious figure. John Eldredge unpacks the personality of Jesus in the four Gospels — his humor, courage, compassion, playfulness, fierceness and love. It taught me how to know Jesus and enjoy him on a more personal level. Reading the Gospels went from black and white to UHD color.
“A Tale of Three Kings” by Gene Edwards is short, sweet and the greatest leadership book I’ve ever read. Edwards uses the stories of Saul, David and Absalom to beautifully and realistically reveal the secrets of humility and brokenness in leadership. The book means so much to me because it deeply shaped the way I respond to difficult leaders and painful seasons and challenged me to trust God to choose how much success I experience.
Last but not least is “Mind Shift” by Erwin McManus. Each chapter is a separate mindset, and you can read them in any order you’d like. In the pages of his book, Erwin challenges me to level up my mental frameworks because my limiting beliefs will limit my life. Each chapter has spoken to me in a specific season. When I read or listen to Erwin McManus, I see a man who lives with the vibrancy of a young man even in his sixties, and it inspires me to learn how he thinks and emulate how he lives.
Certain things can be godsends, helping us survive, even thrive, in our fast-paced world. Does technology ever help you this way? Has an app ever boosted your spiritual growth? If so, how?
Having a phone is a challenge for me. I have an ADHD brain that can’t handle the platforms and push notifications as well as most people can. So instead of highlighting an app, I’m going to offer one very simple morning ritual that has changed my life: Scripture before smartphone.
Justin Whitmel Earley makes a brilliant point that babies are born looking for somebody who is looking for them. Newborns make the craziest transition from the warmth of a womb to the coldness of a crazy world, and they look for somebody who is looking for them. Neurochemistry shows us that the moment a mom and a newborn meet each other is as big a deal as the tsunami of oxytocin makes it feel. And what both of them feel is: “You are the one I’ve been looking for.”
Early says, “Each morning we are born anew into the world,” and 89% of us reach immediately for our phones — and I’m a culprit of this more than I care to admit. Our phones light up with facial recognition as soon as we turn our gaze to them. However, tragically, there is nobody looking for us back. Only our own reflections.
When you start your day with 10 minutes of Scripture before you reach for your smartphone, you find a God who is looking for you back, and it sets your brain, your body and your soul to fix your eyes on things above for the rest of the day. It seems like a small habit, but all life-changing ones are if done consistently.
QUESTION #8: dream
God’s continually stirring new things in each of us. So give us the scoop! What’s beginning to stir in you but not yet fully awakened? What can we expect from you in the future?
Next week I’m going to start writing my second book. It’s been brewing in my heart and mind for the last three years, ever since my Vicodin addiction ended and my new journey of sobriety and the fullness of life began. I’m passionate about using Scripture and science to help give people a rule of life and framework for thriving in a modern world of a million distractions.
Addiction is no longer a conversation about heroin, whiskey and “those” people; it’s now a conversation for all people about a hundred different drugs of choice. We all live with pain, and we now have an abundance of options to medicate the pain, whether it’s a beer bottle or a little orange pill bottle, TikTok or Netflix, pornography or shopping, success or status, food, sex, relationships, video games — we now have endless options to escape and distract.
The secret to the future, according to scientists and sociologists, is the ability to self-regulate in a world of quick dopamine hits. That’s interesting to me because self-control is the final fruit of the Spirit. It makes me wonder if self-control is the secret to living focused and free as we move into the future.
Studies show that over 16% of Americans are addicted to alcohol or drugs. But how many more struggle with the “unconventional” addictions Doug mentioned, like shopping or pornography or entertainment? How many people are simply searching for a distraction from their pain?
“I am the bread of life,” Jesus said in John 6:35 (ESV). “Whoever comes to me shall not hunger, and whoever believes in me shall never thirst.”
No matter your struggle, no matter your weakness — you are welcome at Jesus’ table. To eat and be satisfied. All you need to do is come.
Doug Wekenman is the teaching pastor at Red Rocks Church. He believes God has more for you — good plans that he’s had in mind since before you were born — and has a passion for making faith come alive for people. He does that by writing and speaking about trusting God and stepping into the next chapter of your life with confidence. Doug is a husband, father, friend and pastor who lives in Austin, Texas, with his wife, Samantha, their three children and their black lab, Luna. He loves people, the ocean, golf, guitar, sneakers and tacos.