Nigel Darius
9 min read ⭑
Nigel lives by one resounding message: There’s hope for humanity. Armed with that belief and an aptitude for introspection and creative expression, he spends his professional time giving lectures, writing poetry, organizing community events and advocating for social justice. His latest project, “Fragments & Finality,” uses poems, essays, visuals and short stories to explore the concept of identity from a variety of angles. Today on Rapt, Nigel is opening up about his creative process, why deep rest is essential to his work, and the resources that add joy and meaning to his life.
QUESTION #1: ACQUAINT
There’s much more to food than palate and preference. How does a go-to meal at your favorite hometown restaurant reveal the true you behind the web bio?
I’ve lived in Atlanta for eight years and hang out on Edgewood every week. My favorite restaurant in that area is Staplehouse. It offers elevated American cuisine and unique food and cocktail options. They’re only open from Thursday to Sunday, so I always drop in for lunch.
The moment I come in, I’m greeted by the owner, her wonderful service staff, and all the chefs in the kitchen — I feel like I’m at home. I bump into other regulars often, and we’ll typically end up having impromptu meals together that lead to what feels like podcast discussions. Ping-ponging topics back and forth like our personal philosophies, faith journeys and individual life experiences. It’s truly beautiful and unlike your everyday, typical restaurant-goer experience.
I kid you not; this happens every single week.
I order their Caesar, Focaccia bread, and garlic chili alkaline noodles. I’ll enjoy a grapefruit montane in the meantime, too. If I don’t have a busy day, I’ll hang out at the bar and have a coffee to catch up on whatever I’m reading at the time. Currently, it’s “Four Thousand Weeks” by Oliver Burkeman.
QUESTION #2: REVEAL
We’ve all got quirky proclivities and out-of-the-way interests. So what are yours? What so-called “nonspiritual” activity (or activities) do you love engaging in, which also help you find essential spiritual renewal?
This quote by Rabbi Abraham Heschel about rest changed my life: “If you work with your hands, sabbath with your mind. If you work with your mind, sabbath with your hands.”
I like to approach life from a rested state — working from it, not for it. I work with my head a lot. Much of my work requires research, critical thinking and sinking into emotional states to express ideas, so establishing a healthy rhythm of restoration has been paramount for me!
I love the mountains. There is something about being outdoors that helps me reintegrate myself when I’m spread thin. I go to Colorado quite often (Denver, to be specific), and it’s become like a second home to me.
I rent a Tesla for the week, stay in the Highlands (an exceptionally walkable and pretty neighborhood) at a very bougie Airbnb, make reservations at the nicest restaurants I can find, read books, write at local coffee shops, drive out to Boulder to shop at my favorite boutique store, and always go hiking or trail running on the most scenic routes! Mt. Senitas is my current favorite.
I try to hold back the tears every time I leave because I love it so much.
QUESTION #3: CONFESS
Every superhero has a weakness. Every human, too. We’re just good at faking it. But who are we kidding? We’re broken and in this thing together. So what’s your kryptonite, and how do you hide it?
During COVID in 2020, I found myself falling in love with moonlight. I lived about a half-mile off of the main road in Alpharetta, Georgia, and there was no light pollution affecting my ability to see the moon clearly and experience the moonlight. I would stay up sometimes until 3 a.m. just enjoying the night and moonlight and dreaming about what I would do when tomorrow came. I enjoyed my solitude so much that it was hard for me to go to sleep sometimes because I just wanted to stay up and do things with that space and time.
I’m still very much like that now. I like to squeeze every ounce out of the day. I want to work, go to the coffee shop, see friends and share experiences together, stream a show and go for a walk or bike ride. I just want to be active all day because of how much I truly enjoy living.
The downside to this is that I find myself easily underwhelmed if things don’t turn out the way I expect them to. My kryptonite is that I struggle with the mundane. I like to optimize my experiences and amplify things to make them more enjoyable when I could just appreciate things for what and how they are instead.
QUESTION #4: FIRE UP
Tell us about your toil. How are you investing your professional time right now? What’s your current obsession? And why should it be ours?
Over the last two years, I’ve been working on my third book. I’m more excited about this project than I have been about many others.
I found two staggering studies that left me with my jaw on the floor. The first was that 80% of Americans are monolingual compared to the rest of the entire world, of which only 40% are monolingual. An adjacent study showed that 25% of Americans are illiterate.
It reveals to me not only that we don’t speak each other’s languages, but also that if we claim to understand someone’s language, we could actually be contextually misinterpreting the meaning.
So I’ve compiled a book titled “We Say Shalom” — a series of what I like to call “heart practices” that can help us handle our humanity. The book is a journey filled with words from various languages, offering a daily invitation to learn new words, see from new perspectives and approach life more with curiosity than misunderstanding.
I chose the word shalom because it is wrapped in wholeness, completeness and healing that unifies the self and every party involved.
It is not your typical read either. It utilizes poetry, short stories and essays to diversify our approach to connecting with one another. I don’t have a release date yet, but I’m hopeful that it will be out at the end of this year or the beginning of the next!
QUESTION #5: BOOST
Cashiers, CEOs, contractors, or customer service reps, we all need grace flowing into us and back out into the world. How does the Holy Spirit invigorate your work? And how do you know it’s God when it happens?
I think a lot about the word “represent.” I view it as “re-present,” a re-presentation, if you will, of God’s image, heart and love uniquely expressed through who I am and what work I share with the world.
Much of my work calls the person receiving it to think a bit more critically and engage with their emotions more often than they would.
When I push back from my desk after writing about a particular topic, expressing an idea, crafting a keynote presentation or constructing a piece of creative content, sometimes I get a feeling of divine fulfillment. I know when it’s God and when it’s just another good idea.
I also operate by this creative principle: “If it’s healing, put your hands on it.” A lot of my work has a restorative, healing element. And if what I create or produce impacts and affects me on a visceral level, I believe that it will do the same for others. (I shamefully admit that I am easily unimpressed and often underwhelmed.)
QUESTION #6: inspire
Scripture and tradition beckon us into the rich and varied habits that open our hearts to the presence of God. So let us in. Which spiritual practice is working best for you right now?
Fellowship and communion have been very invigorating practices for me lately. They are both huge parts of my life. I heard once from one of my favorite teachers that “God speaks in surround sound.” If we’re willing to listen, we can find his voice in a variety of places (not just one).
In and out of seasons, I find myself experiencing affirmation, encouragement, edification and spiritual formation through the individuals I’m closest to in life. It was Patti Digh who said, “The shortest distance between two people is a story.” You think you’re alone until you open up someone else’s pages and see that you share similar struggles.
There’s just something so sweet, sacred, and spiritual about communion with those who are on their faith journey, too. And to be honest, if I didn’t have such a wonderful, rich community of people who feel deeply, share liberally and think critically, I quite literally do not know where I would be (in both life and my faith journey).
QUESTION #7: FOCUS
Looking backward, considering the full sweep of your unique faith journey and all you encountered along the way, what top three resources stand out to you? What changed the game and changed your heart? What radically altered your life? What changed your reality?
Let’s start with books. James Baldwin once wrote, “You think your pain and your heartbreak are unprecedented in the history of the world, but then you read.” These few books have helped shape my spiritual journey:
“Learning to Walk in the Dark” by Barbara Brown Taylor
“Screwtape Letters” by C.S. Lewis
“Letters to a Young Poet” by Rainer Maria Rilke
“Just Do Something” by Kevin DeYoung
“Four Thousand Weeks” by Oliver Burkeman
Additionally, my two favorite teachers are Robert Madu and Dr. Dharius Daniels. They are wonderful storytellers who make the gospel and life of Jesus apparent and easily approachable.
Lastly, I am very much in love with many of Esther Perel’s ideas. She has a talk from SXSW ‘23 titled “The Other AI: Artificial Intimacy” that explores how systematizing our lives for convenience is costing us what it may mean to actually explore and understand who we are (both as humans and a society).
We all have things we cling to to survive (or even thrive) in tough times — times like these! Name one resource you’re savoring and/or finding indispensable in this current season, and tell us what it’s doing for you.
There’s an app called Open. It’s an app for meditation and breathwork. I’ve taken almost 200 classes and meditated somewhere around 1,000-2,000 minutes over the course of the last seven to eight months. It’s a mainstay for me now, and it may sound dramatic, but I cannot live without it.
The benefits of meditation and breathwork have changed my brain, helped me become emotionally healthier through awareness, and made me more grounded.
Many of us run through life and attempt to achieve, perform and hustle our way into opportunities and environments. Stepping back is what helps me make progress now. I truly love to live a slow life with healthy rhythms that keep me empathetic, aware and energized.
QUESTION #8: dream
God is continually stirring new things in each of us. So give us the scoop! What’s beginning to stir in you but not yet fully awakened? What can we expect from you in the future?
This is very fresh, but I just quit my job of almost four years. I had been feeling for quite some time that God was calling me away from the comfort of a guarantee into the curiosity and fulfillment that exists in the unknown. The thing is, I had absolutely nothing lined up when I left. No job opportunities, no contracts and only several speaking engagements that would help me float for a month or two to figure it out.
But here’s what I am believing God for:
I am expecting God to meet me around every twist and turn of the journey.
I am expecting God to provide for me in abundance (with opportunities, financial provision and clarity on what’s next).
I am expecting what lies ahead to be unimaginable.
I’ve never felt more equipped and prepared to move forward, even if the path isn’t fully lit and clear for me to walk down. I’ve got my next book ready to publish, I’ve got new keynotes ready to present on conference stages, and I’ve got ideas in the form of content being deployed daily that I’m excited to share with the world.
This is a difficult juncture for me because I know where I want to be, and the distance between my vision and reality seems long. But I can’t see what God sees, and I don’t know what he knows, so I’m choosing to trust him through it.
What did Peter feel, I wonder, when he took his first step out of the boat (see Matthew 14:22-33)? Perhaps as waves pounded at his feet and lightning tore through the black sky, he felt a sense of exhilaration in defying science and reason — and maybe a pang of uncertainty, too.
Those two feelings often go together, especially when responding to a call from God. This world will always try to remind us that our obedience is too risky or requires too much sacrifice.
But instead of focusing on our surroundings (as Peter did, and began to sink), let’s look at the goal ahead of us. What, or whom, are you walking toward? What risks are you taking to get there? And how is Jesus asking you to trust him right now?
Nigel Darius is an artist, author and educator — although most people call him a storyteller or translator. The center of his work: humanity, or more specifically, giving humanity hope through honest introspection. His latest book, Fragments & Finality, explores the concept of identity through the lenses of culture, race, faith, family system theory, politics and more. When he’s not deep in thought or working on his next project, Nigel enjoys doing hot yoga, riding his bike, going on walks and taking care of his 20 rare house plants.