Stay Present With Kids After Divorce
Jim Daly
Focus on the Family
A weekly advice column written by Jim Daly, Focus on the Family draws upon a deep, abiding Christian faith to help heal broken marriages and troubled families, built on a foundation of “the power of hope and second chances.” Focus on the Family’s sound, Christian guidance gives readers helpful answers on how to navigate a steady path in an uncertain world.
Q: My wife left me and filed for divorce, which I didn’t want. But now it’s done. I’m concerned about how I can have a positive influence on my kids since I’m only allowed to be with them a few days out of each month. Do you have any advice?
Jim: My heart goes out to you. While it may seem trite, a good place to begin is with the classic “Serenity Prayer”:
God grant me the serenity
To accept the things I cannot change;
Courage to change the things I can;
And wisdom to know the difference.
The application here is straightforward. Maintaining an influence in the lives of your children, despite the breakup of your family, requires courage. It means finding the strength to maximize every opportunity that comes your way. Meanwhile, you have to accept your current limitations and make the most of the circumstances.
When you do have time with your kids, intentionally put it to the best use possible. You don’t have to be a “Disneyland Dad.” In fact, it’s best to make your limited time with them as normal and upbeat as possible.
Here are a couple of suggestions to keep in mind:
— Don’t play the blame game; resist the temptation to badmouth your ex-spouse or complain about the “system.”
— Don’t try to compensate for the pain and confusion of divorce by acting like a superhero. All the exotic outings in the world can never take the place of a loving dad who is simply there for his children when they need him.
So be there, whether that means helping them with their homework, taking them out for ice cream or “just” sitting and talking with them.
If you’d like to discuss your situation in greater detail with our staff counselors, I invite you to call 855-771-HELP (4357).
Q: My kids are really interested in what they call “AI Video Generators.” Should I be concerned?
Adam Holz, Plugged In: By now, most of us have probably heard about generative artificial intelligence programs like ChatGPT. These programs scour the internet and then synthesize results — quickly. It’s not hard to see how a student wanting a bit of a shortcut on a research paper might find such capability appealing.
But what you may not know is that generative AI’s capacities don’t stop with words. This technology can create images and video, too. Recently, for example, Coca-Cola attracted criticism for a Christmas ad that was created by generative AI.
As parents, we need to be aware of how this technology might affect our kids when it comes to scholastic tasks such as writing research papers. But we can’t stop there, as many teens are experimenting with generative AI to create video content as well. That reality comes with both pros and cons.
On the plus side, this tool could unlock new avenues for artistic expression. For example, kids might play around with different kinds of visual scenes, characters and stories. And they’re becoming fluent with a kind of content creation that will likely become more prevalent moving forward.
However, there’s also reason for strong caution. Generative AI creates a finished product almost instantly. But for human beings, legitimately honing artistic skills takes time and practice. Just as AI can create a shortcut when it comes to writing, it could enable similar shortcuts for visual media — perhaps undermining a young person’s creative development. And there’s always the risk of kids creating and consuming explicit or disturbing content.
Generative AI is likely here to stay. Our job as parents is to help our kids understand its strengths and its potential problem areas as more and more people use this new technology to create content of all kinds.
Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author and president of Focus on the Family. He is also the host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at jimdalyblog.focusonthefamily.com or at Facebook.com/JimDalyFocus.
Distributed by Andrews McMeel Syndication. Copyright © 2025. Used with permission.