True Masculinity is Defined by a Man’s Inner Strength
Jim Daly
Focus on the Family
A weekly advice column written by Jim Daly, Focus on the Family draws upon a deep, abiding Christian faith to help heal broken marriages and troubled families, built on a foundation of “the power of hope and second chances.” Focus on the Family's sound, Christian guidance gives readers helpful answers on how to navigate a steady path in an uncertain world.
Q: Leading up to Father's Day I've been somewhat contemplative, thinking about what marks “true masculinity.” What's your take on the subject?
Jim: I think at a certain level, pretty much every man wants to feel like a hero. We’re built to be warriors and adventurers. The problem is that most guys don't feel like they get a chance to use their true strength on behalf of their family very often. Really, how often does a dude march in from the front yard on a Saturday and puff out his chest to announce: “I mowed the lawn!” That just doesn’t quite hit it for most of us.
Perhaps that’s why so many young men feel that they have to prove their manhood through power or brute strength — how much weight they can lift or how hard they can punch. That might be the Hollywood (or sports bar) standard for heroes. But in everyday life, true masculinity is defined by a man's inner strength.
A real man lays his life down for his family every day. It's when a dad plays catch in the front yard even though he’s tired from a long day at work. Or when he talks his daughter through her first heartbreak — even though he’d rather she not grow up at all. Sometimes it’s as simple as a husband skipping the game on TV to run an errand for (or with) his wife.
Those things may not sound very heroic. But that’s because guys usually think masculinity is found in the big things. The truth is it’s mostly found in the inner strength that enables a man to serve his wife and kids in the small ways every day. And there’s no greater adventure than successfully guiding and protecting your small tribe through the jungle of this crazy mixed-up world. Dads: Stand tall.
Q: My teen son, daughter and their friends are constantly guzzling energy drinks. Am I right in thinking this has to be bad for them?
Dr. Danny Huerta, Vice President, Parenting & Youth: Your concerns are valid. It’s really not healthy for anyone to consume beverages that are so high in sugar and caffeine. But there’s increasing evidence that energy drinks can be harmful to teens, including their mental and emotional health. Researchers are finding increased risks of anxiety, panic attacks, mood issues and ADHD-type symptoms in teens who consume large amounts of these kinds of energy drinks.
Many teens see energy drinks as a way to help manage fatigue, social pressure, stress and things that seem overwhelming — or to find an edge in sports or academics. However, they just end up creating more problems for themselves in the long run, such as the possibility of ongoing dehydration, heart issues, jitteriness, insomnia and emotional issues (including a higher risk of suicide and addictions).
Since your teens are most likely trying to solve something through these drinks that jolt their brain and body, it’s important to explore what they are trying to address. Instead of simply saying “no” and moving on, learn what your teens are wrestling with physically, emotionally and mentally — and help them find healthier options.
Many different natural supplements and healthful drinks can give your teens an energy boost. Discuss healthy boundaries and explore other beneficial options, including stevia or monk fruit as sweeteners and organic green tea or coffee bean extract for the caffeine. These drinks usually contain a fraction of the caffeine that's in conventional energy drinks. Researchers affirm that 100 mg to 200 mg of caffeine throughout the morning hours can have some benefits. However, consuming caffeine past noon, and in amounts over 300 mg, can have adverse effects.
For more practical parenting answers and tips, visit FocusOnParenting.com.
Jim Daly is a husband and father, an author and president of Focus on the Family. He is also the host of the Focus on the Family radio program. Catch up with him at jimdalyblog.focusonthefamily.com or at Facebook.com/JimDalyFocus.
Distributed by Andrews McMeel Syndication. Copyright © 2024. Used with permission.